Uncovered

as in a locker room and all the bare body parts glistening under the unflattering fluorescent lights, right there inscribed in paper by his teachers about middle bear’s brazen behavior in the classroom. Why wasn’t this brought up in the three face-to-face meetings we had throughout the year, even when I questioned, “How do you get him to sit all day, I can’t get him to sit in the nest…not even to eat?” He even prefers to graze through his meals on his feet at times. Homework time is 100% focused on him…can’t even prep a meal while we work, along with a heck of a lot of patience. This recent revelation was upon his teachers request to evaluate him for a disability so “we can see how to teach him.” Here’s a concept for you…discipline. Remember those days where it was unacceptable to disrupt the class and if so parents were informed. I get it my middle bear is not the ideal student, but I can’t blame him for it all if he was allowed to carry on and for giving him way too much independence even in the third grade. His impulsive and at times thunderous character clearly illustrates that he isn’t ready and please dear teacher don’t give me the BS of this is his “authentic” work when clearly he rushed to get his independent writing assignments done (all of them this year!) without ANY proper capitalization and punctuation. He has completed first and second grade work with more thought and more punctuation, undoubtedly more patience and probing on his former teachers’ part.I wake up fretting about this, not so much middle bear’s average academic work, but the lack of connection and care, confidence and responsibility for himself and his schoolwork. The school doesn’t have a clue about his case, they insist on viewing the report conducted by the doctor which did not diagnose him with a disorder and suggests nothing about focusing measures. So while we fall in this grey area, we struggle to figure things out ourselves. If a disorder was confirmed then a plan would be in place to steer him in the right direction, but his fidgeting in class is presumed to be…I don’t know, I’m not the expert and they seem to be carefree while careworn parents are at a loss. Papa Bear and I have to come up with our own solutions…any ideas? Dreams take a while to unfold but middle bear seems to be dreamless at least about school. It’s not that he dreads it, au contraire he’s up and atom even before I am, however for him it’s about being with his friends not about the scrambling of letters or numbers on scary blank lined-pages. In the swirl of the final weeks of school, suddenly there isn’t enough time to make up for it all. How exactly needs contemplation, an entire summer’s worth, as homework and sports wrap up for a short term, I will continue to paint…the best meditation and just maybe when a fresh new look takes place in the nest, just maybe I will still my thoughts and a fresh idea will come about to boost confidence and instill excitement for a new academic year.  A balanced, inviting, encouragingly deep and effective approach, yes that is our summer challenge, because the fourth-grade digs deeper into those unnerving digits and unfamiliar and daunting words. Now, that the school year can be tucked away by the teacher and most of her students, we have work ahead of us. But now that it is all uncovered, we at least know where to start. Again.

I recently pulled the covers off this stack of books I have in the kitchen and I am loving the colors in this spot on the counter. Sometimes, unveiling what’s underneath can be enlightening and charming, maybe it’s the start of the real work. Raw, exposed and not afraid of any stains. Jacket-less.

12 thoughts on “Uncovered

  1. my niece seems to be suffering from the same case, third grade hasn’t been pleasant for those caring for her. Math has proven unbearable, concentration is at is lowest, but she loves going to school. She is the closest example I see of a changing educational system, where teachers don’t know how far to push a kid and not get into trouble at the same time. Hope this summer is productive for your middle bear.

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    • Thank you, I’m tired of hearing he’s a boy because his brother is a boy and his focus is impeccable…all individuals are different some need more patience than others…hope learning clicks before middle school for them.

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    • What a great idea! Middle bear is doing his physical morning excersises…you don’t have to tell him twice about any sports…now if that can carry over into academics!

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  2. There’s a fabulous book called Why Gender Matters by Dr. Leonard Sax. It talks, among other things, about how boys and girls are different and learn differently, etc. He also talks about how so often teachers want to label students with ADHD, etc. b/c they can’t handle them, and the parent goes along with it and gets the kid drugs when what’s really needed is better discipline. Anyway, I feel ya. Sorry you have to go through this. :/

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  3. I really do wonder about the teacher. I was a lower elementary grade teacher so I’m not quick to criticize, but the fact that you weren’t brought into the equation early in the school year seems very odd. I have one other observation from afar. You are SO creative and artistic, I just wonder if he isn’t also and simply slow to warm up to traditional methods of classroom teaching. He may always need teachers with more flexibility in their teaching bag of tricks! That doesn’t help you much, but I think with another teacher he might find something in school that excites him. I feel for you, but I’m confident that summer vacation is going to help you find the best way forward!

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    • Yes a different approach is in need but what disappoints me the most is that we are not kept in the loop. She still hasn’t communicated any of his behaviors with us even after a meeting with the principle. We have read about his frustrationed behaviors and comments on his report card, again never with a call to us so that we can give encouragement and help out similtaneously…the school just doesn’t get it. Strenghth and patience to us!

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